When I was a kid my big brother could elicit fear in me in several ways. One was by folding his middle finger down until it was held at the base of his thumb. That would give it maximum velocity when he let it go. And velocity was important when he was "thunking" me on the top of my head. For some reason he got great pleasure in thunking me. It hurt like the devil every single time and he knew it. A malicious grin would come across his face and he would chuckle as he walked away. To this day if I see him bending his thumb down I get scared. Of course I don't show it, I just find an excuse to casually leave the room. That is his way of "hitting someone upside the head with a 2x4." I've been hit many times.
He also could elicit fear by getting up the earliest on Saturday mornings and eating all the sugar cereal. The guy weighed 92 pounds dripping wet all through high school and could eat an entire box of Count Chocula in one sitting. Fast. So fast that when you heard that "ding, ding, ping" of that cereal hitting the bowl you better get your butt out of bed or you weren't going to eat anything good for breakfast.
And he didn't play fair. One day when I was six years old (and he was about 10 or 11) he held a quarter in his hand and told me that if I guessed the year it was made I could have it. The first year that popped into my head was 1976. But for someone reason I said 1977. He laughed gleefully and showed me the quarter. 1976. Damnit. I'm still mad about that. I think I stomped around and pissed and moaned for several days about that. I ALMOST said 1976. I MEANT to say 1976. I want my quarter.
But don't get the wrong idea. I'm not holding a grudge. Really. I really am feeling bad that his pool has turned into a mud pit. If I could go down there and suck the water out I would. In a hearbeat. Just as soon as I finish this cereal.
2 comments:
I could eat a whole box of fruity pebbles in less than 3 minutes!
Reason I did it though, was so none of my sisters got any of it!
and the quarter was 1977, but I switched it and showed you the 1976 one, remmber I use to do magic all the time?
Man thats great, 20 years and your still peaved over the quarter, AWESOME!
I hope you remember that your parents did not approve of those horrible behaviours. But sometimes the eyes in the back of our heads didn't work too well.
But, I talked to your brother on the phone this afternoon and told him he is grounded.
If he ever thumps you again, which is unlikely since you're not six anymore, we'll have to take away a favorite toy. Maybe his bar-b-que grill!
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